Monthly Archives: July 2010

Believe it. It’s your girlfriend at the lunch table doing her dad’s lecture with a bizarre sailor with a sore throat inflection. It’s your grandson at Thanksgiving pretending to be his angry first grade teacher, hitting the squeaky high notes … Continue reading →

That was a close one. Last night you hit the pillow without a safety net and fell into a free-falling slumber with no end in sight. You could have slept all day, you could have slept all night, but somehow … Continue reading →

Embrace your inner monkey. Dirty crumpled socks, dropped Doritos, rogue pen caps: We see you there. Yes, we see you right in the crosshairs of our toes and we’re about to scoop you up with a good old fashioned foot … Continue reading →

Time for some fun in the sun. Spiking volleyballs in the backyard, tossing frisbees at the beach, or just running around in your bathing suit on the scorching sand, it’s always fun getting hot and sweaty before racing to the … Continue reading →

My friend Mike taught me the power of Mustache Maintenance. Whenever we running late on a Friday night back in college Mike would race up the stairs and shave off his mustache fuzz in ten quick seconds. It took away … Continue reading →

Get your mash on long. Get your mash on strong. How great is it that a bunch of rock-hard brown things yanked from the dirt can turn into a creamy smooth-n-salty canvas of deliciousness right in the middle of our … Continue reading →

Man, I’m a master of the Ghost Loan. This is where I borrow someone’s favorite book and them promptly leave it on my shelf for months without touching it. Sure, I see it, I look at it, I think about … Continue reading →

Let’s face it. We’re all idiots who love cranking taps and have no idea when reckless shaving and face-washing shenanigans might flood our bathroom floors. Thanks for watching our backs, little hole. AWESOME! There will be a special announcement on … Continue reading →

Enjoy the silence. Maybe you’re an early bird who goes jogging on the cool sand as the sun rises. Ocean waves quietly lap to shore together with twisted messes of dark seaweed and chipped seashells as faint orange sunbeams peek … Continue reading →

Once upon a time we didn’t have forks. Yes, our ancient ancestors were forced to scoop saber-tooth tiger brains out with twigs, hold woolly mammoth meat over the fire with spears, and eat prehistoric pies with a spoon. According to … Continue reading →