#504 Acrobatic snoozing moves

Everybody loves a good snooze.

That’s where you groggily dive back into the sleepy underworld for a few more minutes of lazy-boned bliss before waking up to get your day on. It’s even better when you tap the snooze button with a bit of acrobatic showmanship that keeps you dreaming before your wide-awake self invades the place.

Here’s how to keep on snoozing in the free world:

1. The Blindfold. You’ve long memorized the shape and location of your snooze button, so when it starts buzzing you don’t even open your eyes. Nope, you just fumble until you find it and kick back for nine more minutes of heaven.

2. The Behind The Back. Here’s where you’re facing away from the alarm clock when it starts ringing, but instead of flipping right over you casually toss your arm in the air and reach backwards until you find the snooze. Also known as the Reverse Angle Shoulder Twist.

3. The Outsource. Perhaps your clock starts buzzing as your boyfriend is hopping around putting his pants on or while your sister’s knocking on the door trying to wake you up. Either way, you outsource your snoozing to them with a cute and groggy “Mmmnnn … can you hit … button.”  Of course, their payment for doing the job is that soft and slow eyes-closed smile curling onto your face as you fade out.

4. The Toe Tap. You’ve been tossing and turning all night and now you’ve got the Toe Vent going in a perfect spot to use your foot to tap the button. If you manage to avoid knocking over your glass of water or accidentally kick your alarm clock to the floor, this can be a stunningly beautiful move.

Yes, pulling off an acrobatic snooze makes you feel like a trapeze artist way up inside a big tent at the roaring climax of the circus. Sweat drips down your forehead and onto your tight white unitard as you stare with steady eyes at your wide-eyed partner swinging towards you. Suddenly you bend your knees and jump high and wide into their open arms before quickly locking and soaring breathless over all the bright lights below…

Elephants trumpet, lions roar, and jaws drop as  you somersault with a smile way, way up in the darkness. The ringmaster points his cane up at you and screams while thundering applause rains down.

Snooze for the moment. Snooze for the memories.

Snooze for your life.


— Email message —

“Hi Neil, here are my 3 Awesome Things in no particular order: 1) Happening upon an inspiring street performer, 2) On a long drive discovering a great radio station that energizes you and takes your mind off the road, 3) Reading The Book of Awesome and then noticing all the awesome things in your own life.” – Frank from PostSecret

Photos from: here and here