#580 Finding that chopped off fingernail that sailed across the room before anyone else does

Stepping on someone else’s sharp, jabby toenail shard is a painful and disgusting moment. Basically, it has the same creep-out factor as poking a dead bee laying in your windowsill or accidentally crushing a hollow, dusty skull on your tour through the catacombs.

Now, on the other hand, when your toenail suddenly blasts off into outer living room and you manage to find that nearly invisible sucker hiding in the shaggy carpet, well that’s a pretty great feeling.

Good work, Sherlock Toenail.

You cracked the case.


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48 thoughts on “#580 Finding that chopped off fingernail that sailed across the room before anyone else does

  1. I’m afraid to admit that this happened to me about 15 minutes ago, before I checked the site, because it will seem like I’m making this up. I honestly am not.

    And it certainly is awesome!

  2. I remember one time when my father-in-law was visiting us, and we walked in on him cutting his toe nails ON OUR BED!!! WTF?!?!?!?!?

    One of the more dry-heave-inducing moments I can ever remember.


    But this post is AWESOME!

    1. Ha ha! What did you say? This story needs some closure, Freddo. I imagine it was a pretty funny exchange.

      You: “D-dad?”

      Him: (keeps clipping on your pillow)

      You: “Please…. no…. ”

      Him: (looks you straight at the eye, squints a bit, and keeps clicking)

      1. I don’t think I said anything.. I was horrified and permanently scarred. I left my wife to deal with it.

        To this day, neither of us can pull out a pair of nail clippers without one of us saying: “REMEMBER WHEN…” followed by the sound of me dry heaving.

  3. Oh Neil, that is one of your funniest. I actually have a similar problem with fake fingernails. They can end up in the strangest places and sadly you do not find them for days if at all…….not awesome! Thanks!

    1. Fake fingernails! Good point, Cheryl. I remember finding one of those in my dentist’s waiting room when I was a kid and being totally fascinated with it. I think I was playing with this shiny, plastic thing for a while before somebody clued me in.

      Felt a bit disgusting afterwards.

  4. I remember one time my dad was making supper, and accidentally cut part of his fingernail off. It was only when my older sister stopped eating her rice mid chew, that we realized where the nail shard ended up. We killed ourselves laughing….except my sister. :D

  5. Am I the only one who has actually (accidentally) crushed a dusty skull in a catacomb?
    Gotta love those old Parisians and their Plauge riddled bones!!

  6. I have to agree. Maybe everyone else’s toenails are well behaved. :) Mine are not.

    No matter how organized I try to be – sitting on the bedroom floor, on my dark rug – one will go FLYING on to my lighter colored carpet… which makes it hard to find. And I’d be mortified if my bf saw it, or stepped on it, which is even worse.

    It IS awesome when you find it. Saves a lot of embarrassment.

  7. especially my grandson who puts everything in his mouth now…that would be so groase!

  8. Ewww. I gotta say I clip my nails in my home, and think it’s disgusting to see people take care of this personal hygiene task anywhere (outside of the home). The same goes for flossing, shaving, tweezing, etc. This should not even be an issue. Remove your body parts in your own home, make my day awesome!

  9. One time I was cutting my toenails (which is hard for me because mine are very thick) and it finally snapped, just as my mom walked in. She will never leave out the story of the time she got hit in the eye with a flying toenail. Haha:) Awesome!

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