#564 Fishing a big piece of lint out of your belly button

Belly buttons means business, buddy.

Yes, your innie or outtie is where heaping truckfuls of DNA were dumped into your ittie bittie body when you were a cute little negative-year-old. And of course, as a special thank-you present from those few fetal months of dump-truck deliciousness, you get a lifelong tummy scar that occasionally gets plugged up with rogue bits of T-shirt lint.

Now, when this happens you know what to do: Slap on some sunblock, grab your rod, and motor out into the deep to reel in that big sucker. After fighting it tooth and nail under the hot summer sun, you’ll feel a strong sense of smirking satisfaction when you finally fish her out and finish the job.

Make sure to grab a photo back at the docks.

AWESOME!

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41 thoughts on “#564 Fishing a big piece of lint out of your belly button

  1. YES! I read your site everyday. I have never commented before but this one is just awesome. I loved your day special, it really hit home and I loved learning more about how this site came about. This is a fantastic post to follow. Thanks for pointing out all the little awesome things that make up life. You are AWESOME!

  2. A few months back, I thought I was picking at some really big, hard piece of lint. After days of trying, I finally pried it out.

    …It turned out to be the bellybutton itself. A 22 year old dried-up remnant of my umbilical cord, and now it’s gone from my body.

    …Awesome?

  3. I’ve got best of both worlds. A unique-ish looking…innie/outtie. There’s a clear visible “button” but all around are deep, dark caverns, nooks, crannies, and all sorts of glorious hiding spots for lint.

  4. I don’t accumulate lint in my belly button, and if I did I doubt removing it would be all that pleasurable. Wiping the sand out of your eye—now that is a horse of a different color.

  5. Well, we all knew this one was coming eventually! So far we’ve cleaned out our ears (#943, 741), noses (#989, 982, 636), colons (#970, 951, 929, 701, 612), bladders (#888, 810), eyes (#920, 746, 732), teeth (#976, 952, 930, 904, 900, 882, 744, 618), mouths (#835), stomachs (#896), toenails (#855), butt-cracks (#662), skin (#800) scabs (#903), lint-traps (#763), e-recycling bins (#712), carpets (#669), glue lids (#646), mud-flaps (#641) and now belly-buttons. Awesome!

    1. Amazing summary.. This must have taken a while, but certainly was worth the effort.

      I just came across this now, as I was going over past posts looking for the chance to add a “that’s what she said”, inspired by BML’s recent post in Not hitting your head.

  6. I just know that somewhere in the U.S. there is a tourist attraction of the “Largest Ball of Belly Button Lint”. Maybe old Route 66.

    That fish is the pic is what Muskie fishermen in Wisconsin would call …..bait.

  7. i don’t really get lint in my belly button, but the last boyfriend i had did, and i got the fun of digging it out of his :P

  8. i don’t really get lint in my belly button, but my last boyfriend did a lot, so i got to pick it out for him sometimes, :P

  9. Your DNA was already in your fetal body before your belly button existed. The umbilical cord delivered nutrient-rich blood.

  10. I generate an incredible amount of navel lint. I’m like a human lint trap. I could get a part-time job just standing in front of dryers at the laundromat.

    My theory is that it’s because I’m hairy; the hair around my navel works like a spiraling vortex drawing lint particles into my navel like matter being sucked into a black hole. Thus, a linty navel is essentially a secondary sexual characteristic, a sign of manliness and ones primal nature. The hairless epicene cannot collect lint nearly as efficiently. (Neither can the thin, for that matter; a deep navel is the result of surrounding abdominal fat, a sign of prosperity.)

    So lint is basically sexy. Proof positive: My girlfriend, who has strong grooming instincts, loves nothing more than to pull it out of my navel, issuing low, satisfied breathy sounds as she does. It used to be that I’d just casually scoop any navel detritus into the toilet while I was standing over it for other business. Now? I inevitably just put it back in there for her to discover later.

  11. Sadly, I have no bellybutton and cannot enjoy this. My doctor cut my umbilical cord almost perfectly even with my stomach.

  12. Not much makes me queasy.
    Mind you, yesterday I was trying to clean my 11 month old grandsons because he made a point of showing me it looked like he needed help. The I noted some discoloured; not so nice looking stuff in there that did not appear to be lint; that which now I can see could make a future Galileo’s story above, for Noah, certainly not one for Grannie’s stomach to tell…
    I got totally freaked out that if I kept on digging and then pulled “it out” something could go terribly wrong because he’s just too new! I know silly but true!

  13. sooo true happens to me almost everyday i thought i was the only one yeaaaaa other ppl have it too

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