#384 Those intense post-Halloween candy trades

You came, you dressed up, you conquered.

Now you’re walking around with bloodshot eyes and a gumball headache as you pack Princess costumes into boxes, peel decorations off the door, and get ready for the important business of sorting through your loot.

Now it’s time to focus. FOCUS. Work through that Halloween hangover and steady your nerves because it’s time to strike some big deals. Maybe a candy currency system even emerges amongst all your siblings and friends:

Large size chocolate bar: 20 points

Loot bag full of assorted treats: +/- 15 points depending on size of bag

Fun size chips or Doritos: 10 points

Popcorn ball: 6 points

Reese Peanut Butter Cup: 5 points (especially valuable if special Halloween version)

All other mini candy bars: 4 points

Little pack of fuzzy peaches or sour gummies: 4 points

Cake items such as Twinkies: 3 points

Two-pack of rock hard gum: 2 points

Licorice: 2 points

Caramels from a big well-known caramel company: 2 points

Lollipops: 2 points (Note: Possible points premium for large sizes or rare rainbow-colored lollipops.)

Lollipops with chewy stuff in the middle: Either 1 point or -2 points depending on whether you have braces

Caramels in clear plastic wrap that are overly sticky and have no name on it and taste like burnt sugar: 1 point

Tootsie Rolls: 1 point

Lemon flavoured anything: 0 points.

Pen from guy who sells real estate: 0 points

Anything healthy including raisins or apples: 0 points

Weird chewy generic halloween candy: -1 point.

So pour out your pillowcase and get ready for some high stakes deals on the basement floor. Don’t forget to keep your personal favorites a secret or you’ll pay a fool’s ransom. (If you sacrifice three bags of chips for a Twinkie, you’ve been had.) Lastly, know who you’re up againstĀ  — does anyone have nut allergies or unhealthy addictions to lime flavoring?

Bottom line: Get in there and get deal-making. Get in there and get teeth-breaking. Get in there and get


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