#846 Sneaking McDonald’s and hiding the evidence

Neil Pasricha

dont-deny-the-urge

Trouble bubbled at my friend Scott’s house the other night.

See, earlier in the week Scott found a used McDonald’s Chicken McNugget sauce container wedged between the car seat and the car door in the Honda Civic he shares with his wife. He dropped his keys in there, and when he slipped his hand down to fish them out, he came up with a sticky, crusty barbecue sauce container instead.

Yes, his wife Molly was caught grease-handed. In Scott’s mind their sturdy New Year’s pact to eat healthy suddenly dissolved into a dimly lit puddle of lies and deception.

Lucky for me, Scott decided to raise the issue on Monday night just before 24 started. Here’s how it all went down.

Scott: “Oh hey, I dropped my keys in that annoying spot between the car seat and the car door earlier today.”

Molly: (curious as to where this is going) “Okay … ”

Don't get caught

Scott: “Yeah, but when I went to pull it out, I found something else instead.”

Molly: (slightly confused) “O-kay … ?”

Scott: (raises eyebrows slowly and smiles)

Molly: (scrunches eyebrow and turns head in confusion)

Scott: “A McDonald’s barbecue sauce container!”

Molly: (guiltily) “Oh! Nooo … ”

Then there was a tiny pause.

And then we all just burst out laughing.

Because seriously, we’ve all been there, man. Sneaking in those secret McDonald’s Drive-Thru trips and ditching the evidence. Yup, gotta make sure you’ve scooped all the fries off the bottom of the bag, wiped the salt off your lips, checked your shirt for ketchup spillage, and safely filed the excess napkins away in the glove compartment.

Just remember to roll down the windows, pay with cash, and play it safe out there.

And never ever order the nuggets.

AWESOME!

Guilty

Photos from: here, here, and here

9 thoughts to “#846 Sneaking McDonald’s and hiding the evidence”

  1. I’ve never had McDonald’s before, but apparently their fries are really good. Maybe I’ll go there one day, if only just for the fries. Also, I’m first to comment! That hardly ever happens! 1 point for Max.

    1. Woohooo, Max!

      P.S. Don’t ever get any fries…”they put an addictive chemical in them that makes you crave them fortnightly!” Yeah, the quote’s really about the Colonel and his chicken, but fits McD’s fries just as well.

      1. I’ll make sure to steer clear of those fries and their chemicals, then. I’ve never really wanted to go to McDonald’s at all, really. At least, not since watching Super Size Me.

        1. You’ve never had McDonalds??? Ever?? I’m not going to ask how that’s even possible. There are plenty of tastey and fattening treats there. Just don’t go too crazy when you finally do get to try it.

  2. Here I thought I was the only one. All those years of guilt and no one to share it with!
    I would put “sneaking fatty food and then destroying all evidence” in my list of top ten things that make me happy. LOL!

  3. Haha missed wrappers, along with the greasy smell that permeates your vehicle fabric! It’s worth the stomach-wrenching guilt every now and then :)

  5. I actually did this the day you posted it. I was home with my baby because day care thought he had pink eye. He didn’t, so we went to McDonalds for breakfast 2 days in a row. I had to hide the bag and the biscuit crumbs from hubby. I stuffed it deep down inside the trash bag. I think I’m getting addicted to the steak, egg and cheese bagels….mmmmmmmmmm

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