There are so many different levels to this classic gag.
There’s Version 1.0 which involves a car full of people, a gas station bathroom break, the locked door, and the slow rolling drive away while the victim knocks on the window and pretends not to care. This version is Locking People Out Of The Car And Pretending To Drive Away Lite, a tame version of the gag intended to induce a few giggles without any tense moments. Just some G-rated comic relief for the long drive home. Version 1.0 is the most commonly practiced version out there and is the officially sponsored and recommended version by 1000 Awesome Things.
Next up is a version that’s a bit more advanced than Version 1.0 but not quite at the level of Version 2.0. We’ll call it Version 1.5, also known as The Big Tease. The Big Tease works as long as the victim leaves their car door open. That open door is critical to pull it off. To execute, the driver simply waits until the victim is approaching the car and then drives away slowly with the door hanging wide open like a big tease. The Big Tease works fine on small or large cars, but is especially effective in vans with sliding doors. You’ve got that big van door just sitting there wide open and the victim may figure it’s worth running and jumping for it. There’s really no telling what could happen in this situation. Just remember to be safe out there.
Next comes Version 2.0 which involves a car full of people, a gas station bathroom break, the locked door, and a complete drive away, lap of the gas station, and return after a minute or two. Big difference here is that Version 2.0 dials up the fear notch a little, instills a tiny bit of bootshake in our helpless victim. When the car comes back some name-calling goes down, but nothing too serious. Still — this one’s not recommended for children twelve and under. Let’s call it Rated T for Teen.
And then finally there’s the grandaddy of them all, the one and only Version 3.0. A real cooker, Version 3.0 involves a car full of people, a gas station bathroom break, the locked door, and a full-out drive away into the sunset, without any eventual return. The victim is left curbside, casually spooning up a McFlurry as they walk around for a couple minutes, expecting the car to come sweeping around the corner any second. But no… the car never comes back. Unless practiced in walking distance of the victim’s house, Version 3.0 can be devastating. And it’s rarely executed and not recommended for obvious reasons: its potential to destroy relationships…to destroy relationships…forever.
19 Comments
June 26, 2008 at 1:00 pm
This should be number 1. HA!
June 26, 2008 at 2:54 pm
ha ha, love it!
Best movie version: Little Miss Sunshine. Of course, that was an unintentional occurance, but still awesome.
June 27, 2008 at 7:45 pm
Agree with it being number 1!
July 18, 2008 at 10:24 pm
Dude, this site is incredible.
I’m so glad I found this.
July 22, 2008 at 5:47 pm
yeah my husband think this is funny to do. Bet it won’t be so funny when I leave him somewhere. ;)
August 1, 2008 at 2:47 pm
[...] Locking people out of the car and pretending to drive away. Version 3.0 is just way too over the top for me. [...]
August 21, 2008 at 12:58 pm
Hey, just discovered your site. I gotta say I think this trick is awesome… but from personal experience, there is a pretty good rebuttal to version 2.0
One a trip in Slovakia with some friends I had the indignity of just not being able to wait for a bathroom.They pulled up in a semi-secluded park and I relieved myself in one of the filthiest places I’d ever seen, probably peeing on dead bodies in this park/trash heap.
Sure enough my friends took off and got back on the highway, hoping to scare me into a mess of tears when they returned. I sprung into action, taking off my shirt, as well as my left shoe. I took the soda (which was the instigator of my forced bathroom and conveniently red), and spilled it suggestively on the ground. I then proceeded to lie face down in between the shoe, shirt and spilled soda with my wallet held in my outstretched arm and waited for my friends to return.
It was one of my proudest moments, managing to not only terrify my friends but also confuse the hell out of unwitting Slovaks who saw someone remove half his clothes and then lie down in filth. My girlfriend’s uncontrolled sobbing and claims that ‘it’s not funny to joke about that kind of thing’ were only a slight dampening factor on one of my finest moments.
May 12, 2009 at 3:35 am
That is a very fine moment indeed!! =) Personally, I’ve always hated this ‘trick’ in any version! It’s only funny for the driver! :P For those of us ‘locked out’ . . . thanks Seth, for making a point!! :) lol
May 13, 2009 at 2:17 am
Niiiiiice!!! If this ever happens to me I will have to be on my toes to remember this. It could backfire if someone decided that the “Dead Man” didn’t need his wallet anymore, a necrophiliac shows up, or they decide to do Version 3.0 and you end up laying there and people walking by really thinking you are NUTS and then finally realizing they are not coming back and you must become a Slovakian to survive. Then you would feel even more worthless. I think from now on I will always carry around a small bottle of red food coloring hanging on a chain around my neck. It sure wouldn’t hurt!! :)
August 21, 2008 at 2:08 pm
Seth, that’s awesome
October 4, 2008 at 4:46 pm
[...] friend shared with me 1000 Awesome Things this morning (this one to be exact — a classic) and I’ve been perusing the site for the past couple hours, [...]
November 18, 2008 at 12:55 pm
My favorite version of this is driving away very slowly with the passenger side window rolled all the way down, and my friend comes dashing up, screaming “Wait! Wait!” and throws herself in through the open window, landing in the passenger seat upside down, legs hanging out the window still.
It takes some timing practice to get right, but it’s priceless, mostly for the entertainment of unwitting bystanders.
December 18, 2008 at 4:43 am
A teacher I knew saw she kicked her ex-husband out the car while they were going through the Holland Tunnel NY. BTW this woman is pretty ruthless so I believe her.
Recently I did the opposite to my baby sister, she was walking in front of my car and I put on the gas.
January 25, 2009 at 10:47 am
I HATE when people do this to me ! Its okay the first time, but if they do it more than once, I get REALLLLLY aggravated. Hahaha.
February 15, 2009 at 2:44 pm
I love version 1.5. The only thing better is when the helpless victim decides to make the jump into the open door and unwittingly goes flying by as the driver, also unwittingly, stops the car to let them in. A simultaneous cacophony of daring, sympathy, and finally hilarity. Simply amazing.
May 4, 2009 at 1:20 pm
3.0…. When you are sleeping in the back while your mom stops at the last rest stop before driving into Canada from the US. She goes in first, and unknowingly to her you get out and go. You come back out, and you see her driving away about to head across the border.
Really funny when this happened to me. As I watched her drive away I realized there was nothing I could do as I knew she couldn’t hear me. So I just stood there and chuckled to myself, knowing that eventually she’d figure it out. They must have thought she was nuts at the border,
May 15, 2009 at 8:25 pm
Great website, but I think the funniest version of this scenario comes from the late night touring of the country side on a double date when finally one poor sucker cannot “hold it’ any more. As they jump out to quickly relieve themselves behind the vehicle, the driver waits until he see’s another car approaching and begins to pull away, the sight of the mortified passenger hopping with their pants around their ankles after their ride is priceless! Guys think it’s hilarious to do to us girls and us girls still married them anyway……
June 18, 2009 at 1:08 pm
The two first ones are really good, and can be very fun and humourous for all of the people involved. But I would not recommend #3. I would’nt even think about it.
June 29, 2009 at 9:15 am
In between version 1.5 and 2.0 should definitely be the one where you drive away. stop. and wait till the person reaches the door. then drive an extra meter. several times, and then you lock the door while the person shouts “guys this isnt even funny” and then you finally unlock the door at the same time they pull the handle, thus resulting in them still being locked outside the car haha