#888 Peeing in a pool

Neil Pasricha

take-a-dip1Okay, admit it.

You’ve done it, I’ve done it, we’ve all done it together.

And sure, peeing in the pool is a bit of a social faux pas, but dang girl, it sure feels good, doesn’t it? After all:

  • Mini hot-tub. You get that classic hot cloud effect, where suddenly there’s a nice warm water-diaper hanging around you. Yeah, yeah, it’s gross, but don’t worry. It’s sterile.
  • Feel that drain. Because holding it in isn’t good for you, either. So just let it out, let your bladder relax, and enjoy the feeling.
  • It’s a secret. Unless you tell others, of course, which isn’t recommended. But there’s something sweet about keeping this one real quiet. Especially because the pool’s probably half urine, anyway. Admitting you just peed will result in everyone else admitting they peed, too.

Now, peeing in a lake is a decent alternative, but without the big dose of chlorine you might actually get someone sick if they go under and swallow a mouthful. And that just really wouldn’t be funny.

No, it wouldn’t be funny at all.

AWESOME!

garden-hose

Photo from: here and here

96 thoughts to “#888 Peeing in a pool”

  3. Never done that. And that is a reason why I don’t like swimming unless there is no one else in the pool.

    You know what’s awesome….swimming in a large pool all by yourself.

    1. I wait till our time is nearly up in the pool my bladder would be full to the brim and then I just relax and pee it’s takes a bit of time because my bladder is full but man it feels like heaven

  4. I really like your list but this one is just gross. I’ve never peed in a pool. I agree with Daniel though, swimming in a large pool by yourself is pretty awesome.

  5. Wow – I think those first 4 commenters are the only 4 people around who have never done this. As long as you don’t do this when you’re the top person in a pool “chicken fight”, I’ve got no problem with this. However, I tend to fall on the side that peeing in a lake is better (cleaner?) than peeing in a pool, based solely on the size of the lake. I mean, there are animals in the lake already that are doing worse than that!

    However, I will lend some support to the “gross” side by mentioning a pretty clever sign a friend of mine had posted next to his backyard pool: “Welcome to our ool. Notice there is no P in it. Please keep it that way.”

  6. Ah! You just missed World Toilet Day! Would have been even MORE awesome. I was on a swim team in college and one of the guys used to pee and then use his hands to squirt the pee water on the girls. He didn’t get many dates…

  8. LOVE your list…this one is a little gross, but you KNOW everyone has done it at one time or another! Geez…and I like the sign idea posted above, have to make me one.

  9. This one was pretty good, actually. I own a pool myself, and I do have signs posted. Oh well. The problem when I do this solemn, relaxing duty, though, is that I momentarily stop moving.

    So people get to know something’s up if they’re really paying attention.

    But I still love this. AWESOME!

  10. i love your list, i’ve only peed in the pool when i was a kid but i didn’t know any better! then there was last year i wanted to pee in a person’s pool that i didn’t like but then i thought, that would’ve been just plain gross of me

  11. Swimmers do this ALL the time. I had a friend who used to make it her goal to pee on as many people a practice as she could without them noticing. Gross… but more just awesome.

    1. We don’t swim in the ocean the water is way too cold for that. There’s a beach where we go on the river to swim in the summer. Nothing there but a beach. Even if I don’t go swimming when I have to pee I go in the water just to pee in it.

      1. where do you live, if the ocean is to cold to swim in? I live in maine and we swim in the ocean at least every week from june to late august! (sometimes May, when we are feeling adventurous).

  14. I consider it a wasted swim if I haven’t peed at least once. And peeing in the ocean, which is filled with fish who presumably do the same? You go right on ahead, Al. I can’t see any problem with that at all.

    Although I heard that in tropical rivers, urine attracts piranhas. So don’t do it there.

    1. Also, in like some lakes in South America, when you pee in the water, it attracts these parasites that swim up your urethra. It’s super gross. Don’t pee in foreign bodies of water, everyone! :]

        1. There’s a fish in the Amazon that can swim up your pee and jam itself in there. Thank you, Grey’s Anatomy.

  15. I’m pretty sure you’ve overestimated the amount of inconsiderate, vile assholes there are. I never have nor will I ever piss in a pool, and I’m pretty sure most people are the same.

    1. The only way I pee in the ocean is by peeing in a tide pool on the beach.
      The next high tide will wash it out and the sealife in the tide pool don’t seem to mind my pee.

  19. Over the weekend, I learned there’s a difference between peeing inside a pool and peeing in a pool. The latter is way fun and usually involves a drunk person, someone else’s house, a camera phone and blackmail ;)

  21. Oh this does not help! I am sitting at work reading this and there is no one to man the front and I have to pee so bad!

    p.s. peeing in the ocean IS amazing.

  22. Everyones done this when they were a kid. Those who say they havent probably werent in a pool until they were an adult. Underwater Bars, where the bottom half of ur body is on a stool underwater and the top half is at the bar is probably the number 1 most peed in adult pool. You know after a few beers you’re definitely gunna just let it out. I used to work a public pool and they pump so much chlorine into the pool that pee really has no effect. Its the brown stuff you have to worry about.

  23. My favorite sign I’ve seen at a pool was “We don’t swim in your toilet, don’t pee in our pool.” It was hilarious.

  24. I swim on the boys’ varsity swim team at my high school. Our coach doesn’t let us get out to pee. He flat out tells us to go in the pool. Our assistant coach is the head couch for the girls’ swim team and she says that they all go in the pool too. I personally think it’s disgusting, but that is the swim teams’ policy at our school. If your in high school, ask a swimmer about it. I want to know if my high school’s the only one.

  25. I swam on the girls’ varsity team, among other teams. I don’t think we were ever told to pee in the pool, but I knew I did – most of my coaches would never allow more than a minute to get out of the water if you really DID have to go, and seeing as I tended to have three suits layered on top of each other in practice, and a wet swimsuit is difficult to get back on after it’s taken off, I would either hold it if I didn’t have to go very badly, or just pee in the water if I did.

    Of course, number 2 always had to wait. -That- one isn’t sterile, and the pool has to get closed for a couple of days if it happens.

  26. Ok all the people who have said they’ve never done that, either never swam in a pool as a child, or are very very deluded! Even if you are one of those people who spends their older-childhood, and adult life being disciplined and NEVER peeing in the pool, I can guarantee that you did as a kid (or you peed in the bathtub at least if you didn’t go to the pool, which lets face it is 10x worse, but you were a kid so no-one really cares!)
    Like my mum use to say it’s like picking your nose, everyone does it, but no-one wants to see it/know about it! (And hey both those things are on the list!! definately Awesome!)

  28. what about those pools that have the “cloud of indecency” when you pee? You know, they turn red/purple/some noticeable colour, and then they have to drain and clean the pool… This was just brought up by a girl in my Social Psych class (cannot for the life of me remember WHY it was brought up…) and she said that it definitely exists and that you should NOT pee in the pool…
    Anyone ever get caught by this unfortunate coloured cloud effect? I’d like to hear about that!

    2. I’d just go anyway, if people know I’m peeing it just adds to the fun!
      Peeing in the ocean is better tho

  29. Some of you people are real gross. I have never peed in an ocean, lake, river, pool, or any type of water. I find it really easy to hold it when I’m any of those places. I’ve been at a beach for 5 hours and didn’t have to pee once. So it’s all in your peoples head that you have to pee. I don’t wanna swim in your toilet so DON’T PEE IN THE WATER! I don’ t care if the fish pee in the ocean that doesn’t mean you should! Lots of you are a whole bunch of disgusting a*ss holes!

  30. It sure would be nice if people knew what they are talking about. Chlorine doesn’t kill urine, it chemically reacts with it and produces a trichloramine that is extremely hazardous to public health. Indoor pools in the U.S. are causing swimmers to get asthma, nasty skin conditions, and eye/vision problems. 25% of the Olympic team has asthma, mostly from years spent in indoor pools. So, please pee in the toilet or stay out of the pool.

  31. my wife tori and I were swimming at a motel pool before we went swimming she had about 8 beers over 3hours or so and never went to the bathroom well we got to the pool and she started taking off her clothes down to her panties she went to use the bathroom which was right in the pool area but it was closed….she said i gotta pee but I will hold it till we get back to the room. she picked up another beer and started drinking it. she got in the pool and started swimming then i saw her cross her legs and she said the water is making it come she couldnt move the she yelled out i cant hold it Im bout to PEE PEE!!!! then the area around her turned into a big bright yellow cloud for about 60 seconds I was 3 feet away from her and the water turned real warm you could really see it. she looked at me and said sorry………. the she said that it felt soooooo good!!!!!!!!

    1. thats funny cause my wife and i were swimming one day at the pool in our apartments and my wife she is the one of those women who does not go the bathroom to pee until she cant hold anymore she will hold it all day well we were on our way to the pool and she had been drinking water from a gallon hug all day we got to the pool and she undressed to her panties and bra and she got in the pool well i jumped in and we started playing volleyball then i grabbed her and started tickleing her she started laughing and giggling then she yelled stop!! while still laughing so i tickled her even harder she laughed even louder, then while sitting in my lap in the pool the water got really really warm, i looked down and saw a big yellow cloud all around me the water continued to stay warm for about 15 seconds i stop tickleing her and she hit me and yelled out see! you made me pee in the pool then the water cooled off back to normal tempature. she later admited that it turned her on to accdentally pee pee on me in the pool and that i better watch out cause she will pee on me in the pool every chance she gets. she said she never knew how good it felt to pee in a swimming pool. strange enough while I was sitting in the middle of that warm yellow cloud of her piss….I got a mega bonner!! I cant for the life of me figure out why!!!!!

  32. you cant get anyone sick peeing in a lake any more then if u went to the toilet… geez where do u people think those lead?

  33. i’ll admit, I did this as a kid. We had a pool. Eventually I stopped when the pee stains became easy to spot and my dad got pissed off! LOL

  34. Okay, peeing in the pool is disgusting. Man at least attempts to keep it clean with our chlorine and salt pools. The ocean, however, is a completely different story. I can relate very well to this article because it’s pretty much the same experience in the Big Blue. And it’s very convenient, too. No need to hunt for a port-a-potty on the beach. My friend’s response upon asking him where the bathroom is as we were both in the water: “you’re standing in it.” >.<

  35. peeing in pools is the best. but when i’m with my best friend we let each other know so we can swim away from eachother. it’s all good.

  36. This is totally awesome. There are few pleasures as sweet as the pure relief that comes of emptying a full bladder, and there is a sense of danger of being caught that adds thrill to the relief and then a sense of success.

    People need to chill out. We _are_ animals, even if we are smart ones (some, not so much as others).

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  38. GROSS!!!! my cousin pooed in a hottub once,
    you should have seen us rocketing into the pool. I think we broke the sound barrier.

  40. Peeing in a WETSUIT is the best.

    So gross… but that full-body washover of warm for a second before the waves knock it out of you… Great feeling. I try not to think of it like pee washing all over my body, and figure being tossed around by salty ocean water for the next two hours makes up for it.

  41. Calm down people. You can’t go in to a pool without having the tiniest tinkle. Who’s gonna go out in a soggy bathing suit to brave the draft, dry up, and go pee in the toilet? Three seconds and you’re done.

    1. Even If I’ve just peed before getting in a pool as soon as the water touches my girl parts I have to pee. Usually I don’t pee in a pool but in this case since I just peed and just got in the pool I pee in the pool.

  42. If it’s any consolation, urine is an unsuitable environment to grow bacteria. Unless you have a urinary tract infection, it is safe to pee in any body of water for the awesome sensation.
    Urine is mostly water with about 5% salt and Urea that later breaks down into ammonia giving us that horrible old urine smell. This makes it even less hospitable to bacteria growth, considering we use ammonia to clean.
    So go ahead, pee in the pool. It feels really good.

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  45. peeing once your out of the water while wakeboarding/waterskiing …
    Awesome.

  46. Well, I have two sisters. My eldest sister is sixteen. My older sister is twelve. I am eight. My Dad lives in America. I live in the UK. When I have to pee and my Mum’s not here I go in the pool, but when she is here I ask to go in the pool, she says no and I say I don’t want to go inside so I go on the grass in my panties.

    1. Miss X Johnson
      You could pee in the pool even if your mom is there. She couldn’t tell if you just pee and keep quiet about it.

  47. doesn’t the pee turn blue in chlorine? I’m pretty sure it does! So every one will know you peed! GROSS!

  48. it’s awesome but still leaves you feeling gross. especially after you see people having fun spitting water at each other

  49. ok, i think some people are taking this to far, and that is those who are getting all defensive about it being disgusting, WE KNOW YOU’VE DONE IT! no point in denying, no point in saying youve never done it before and its gross. you are the people who do it the most! so save your breath and just admit, you have done it before and, it felt good.

  50. it’s realty awesome,, i have done both and i feel very good…. i know its bad one but you want really enjoy, do it and realize then you might know its a wonderful moment…..

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