My friend Rob welcomes visitors to his swanky apartment by flash-bulbing them in the face with a dusty old Polaroid camera.
After the picture slides out and the color fades in he staples it to a foam board in his front hallway. Over time he’s created a giant collage presumably titled Anybody Who’s Ever Visited Me and turned a blank white wall into an artsy conversation piece.
When some friends and I crashed with Rob a year ago he promptly flash-bulbed us in the face a couple times. He handed me the extra pic while sticking the first on the wall and I stuffed it in my bags and forgot about it … forgot about it, that is, until last week when I noticed a tiny white corner sticking out of my suitcase and rediscovered the blurry photo inside a brand new secret pocket!
Yes, finding hidden compartments in things you already own is like striking oil in your own backyard, people.
After all, you’ve known your old pal Backpack forever. You know her left zipper’s gummed up and you’ve watched with teary eyes as her stitching slowly ripped off her left strap. So when you notice a secret built-in pencil case pouch deep down in her inner shadows, it’s a mind-blowing moment. Suddenly she’s got a whole new strut in her step and trot in her walk, like she popped back out of backpack rehab.
Same thing with Bathing Suit. Sure, his zip-string is loose and dangly, he’s covered in lint balls, and his bright red logo has faded to a dull pink, but when you first notice that tiny mesh pocket for holding keys hanging inside his elastic waistband, your brain blasts to outer space. He’s like a hunched over old man suddenly tossing away his cane and then tap-dancing across the sidewalk.
So today let’s give thanks and give cheers to the surprise sunglasses holder in the roof of your car, that second pocket in your navy blue blazer, and the hidden change holder riding like a treasure chest deep down in your car’s arm rest.
AWESOME!
(Big news — book cover released today and we upped it to 400 pages!)
Photos from: here, here, and here
20 Comments
December 21, 2009 at 12:10 am
Well, gosh, I can’t believe how excellent your descriptions are. I can’t tell ya how many times I’ve had gummed up pockets in an old backpack haha. It is truly a unique relationship!
This kind of makes me want to stash random one dollar bills just so I can forget about them and find them later.
Your friend’s polaroid idea is fantastic and hilarious. Makes me want one again!
(Nice end pic, too!)
December 21, 2009 at 1:28 am
Even better: Finding hidden compartments in those hidden compartments. Believe me, they exist.
December 21, 2009 at 2:52 am
they do! & thus, the awesomeness is squared.
December 21, 2009 at 5:10 am
I never get tired of reading you- they’re so many awsome things, that i forget and you manage to pick them up ;) Great ;)
December 21, 2009 at 7:37 am
WOO-HOO!
I’d actually tweeted this specific thing to you on December 11th! Preemptive AWESOME!
Granted, you took it into more detail, and that old tap-dancing man thing is so vivid I can practically see it, but, still.
Also, that book’s just getting longer and longer. Thanks! But I do hope that you’ll be able to have some form of rest when it’s finished.
December 21, 2009 at 9:11 am
Finding hidden compartments is even better when you discover money in them! Ca-ching!
December 21, 2009 at 9:53 am
one of the great exploring activities in life
December 21, 2009 at 10:28 am
This happens with my coats a lot.
December 21, 2009 at 2:36 pm
As always, fantabulous descriptions. Maybe after your book (will be multiple Neil volumes right?) is published you can become a columnist for the NYT, like make it your version of The Slow Lane in the Financial Times, but not financial, strictly awesomeness.
The Awesome Lane
Neil
NYT contributor.
Yes! Please.
December 21, 2009 at 4:16 pm
THATS THE BACKPACK I HAVE!! NORTH FACE ISABELLA!!
and i swear it has so many pockets i can’t even begin to name them all. it’s amazing. very true, secret compartments are great
December 21, 2009 at 6:59 pm
lol – I was giving away a rather lame bag (an work freebie) to a coworker who “needed it” when I learned of the hidden backpack straps, should straps, and extension pocket. I almost asked for it back but figured that would be tacky (and, really, I didn’t need a backpack any more than I needed the original bag).
December 22, 2009 at 3:50 am
Oh this is so true!! Finding hidden compartments not only brings the old backpack or whatnot back to life, it gives it a new life! Suddenly it’s like you have a brand new product that you didn’t have to pay for. Besides, who doesn’t love having a hundred little compartments and pockets!?
December 22, 2009 at 12:30 pm
I just found a BRAND NEW pack of gum in the arm rest in my car that I forgot about.
AWESOME!
December 22, 2009 at 9:49 pm
Woah! I need to see how much it is… I have * counts money* 5, 6, 10, 14…
December 29, 2009 at 12:46 am
The best is finding an inside pocket on a jacket you’ve had for a while. :)
December 29, 2009 at 1:29 pm
Yes! about a week ago I found a pocket in a vest I had owned for 2 or 3 months. Truly awesome.
March 17, 2010 at 1:47 pm
not a bad way of putting it haha
March 30, 2010 at 11:27 pm
that happened to me about a month ago. I have a desk that I thought only had 7 secret drawers in it, but then I found 2 more which were behind 2 drawers and I was so excited I was going crazayyyy and it was amazing.
May 3, 2010 at 1:47 am
I have owned this hat for a long time now, just over 3 years. A couple of weeks ago I had an itch that needed some scratchin’ and that’s when the magic happened. I felt something peculiar. Rectangular in shape. I doffed my cap to inspect what it was I had felt through the cap. I thought maybe it was something that fell into it when it was resting on my side table, a reciept of some kind. Eureka, it was a change pocket to stash extra money, I guess for that in case of emergency moment where you are being robbed. I mean really, what criminal is going to steal your hat? And that is….awesome!
July 21, 2010 at 8:43 pm
I bought a car some time ago. I’ve had it for about half a year. And one day im just playing with the dashboard and pushing knobs and stuff. All of a sudden a hidden compartment comes out…..
OMG! This car has an MP3 radio player!