#504 Acrobatic snoozing

Neil Pasricha

Everybody loves a good snooze.

That’s where you groggily dive back into the sleepy underworld for a few more minutes of lazy-boned bliss before waking up to get your day on. It’s even better when you tap the snooze button with a bit of acrobatic showmanship that keeps you dreaming before your wide-awake self invades the place.

Here’s how to keep on snoozing in the free world:

1. The Blindfold. You’ve long memorized the shape and location of your snooze button, so when it starts buzzing you don’t even open your eyes. Nope, you just fumble until you find it and kick back for nine more minutes of heaven.

2. The Behind The Back. Here’s where you’re facing away from the alarm clock when it starts ringing, but instead of flipping right over you casually toss your arm in the air and reach backwards until you find the snooze. Also known as the Reverse Angle Shoulder Twist.

3. The Outsource. Perhaps your clock starts buzzing as your boyfriend is hopping around putting his pants on or while your sister’s knocking on the door trying to wake you up. Either way, you outsource your snoozing to them with a cute and groggy “Mmmnnn … can you hit … button.”  Of course, their payment for doing the job is that soft and slow eyes-closed smile curling onto your face as you fade out.

4. The Toe Tap. You’ve been tossing and turning all night and now you’ve got the Toe Vent going in a perfect spot to use your foot to tap the button. If you manage to avoid knocking over your glass of water or accidentally kick your alarm clock to the floor, this can be a stunningly beautiful move.

Yes, pulling off an acrobatic snooze makes you feel like a trapeze artist way up inside a big tent at the roaring climax of the circus. Sweat drips down your forehead and onto your tight white unitard as you stare with steady eyes at your wide-eyed partner swinging towards you. Suddenly you bend your knees and jump high and wide into their open arms before quickly locking and soaring breathless over all the bright lights below…

Elephants trumpet, lions roar, and jaws drop as  you somersault with a smile way, way up in the darkness. The ringmaster points his cane up at you and screams while thundering applause rains down.

Snooze for the moment. Snooze for the memories.

Snooze for your life.

AWESOME!

Neil Pasricha and The Book of Awesome will be on the CBS Early Show on Thursday, May 20th.

— Email message —

“Hi Neil, here are my 3 Awesome Things in no particular order: 1) Happening upon an inspiring street performer, 2) On a long drive discovering a great radio station that energizes you and takes your mind off the road, 3) Reading The Book of Awesome and then noticing all the awesome things in your own life.” – Frank from PostSecret

Photos from: here and here

74 thoughts to “#504 Acrobatic snoozing”

  1. sometimes i dont remember hitting the snooze button. actually. that’s all the time.

    but i do miss my alarm clock.

    1. I have a cow alarm clock that you press the horns to set and it says “waaaake uuppp! Ddddooooonnnnttttt sleeeeep your life away” in some strangeaccent that I cant place. it is very odd, but no snooze button :( so I often find my self pressing the horns, but falling back to sleep and thats waht I did this morning

  2. I love love LOVE the idea of “The Outsource”. I’ve never been fortunate enough to experience it … but I just decided it’s a new goal.

    It’s so awesome when you finally do learn your alarm clock. Lately I’ve been using my phone as my alarm more and more frequently, and the first few days were not good … the “shut off” and “snooze” were confusing to me in my sleepy state. Oops! I still do it occasionally. HIT to snooze, SLIDE to shut off. Ok. Got it. (For now …)

    1. You must have an iPhone. It is the bane of my morning existence. How am I supposed to be coherent enough to slide? My eyes are still closed!

    2. I cannot use my phone as an alarm….I’m just not smart enough to figure it out at 5 in the morning.

      1. Things that seem so simple in the daylight hours are extremely challenging to your groggy self. I feel that.

    3. i love snoozing. it’s a favorite way to start pretty much every day.

      i made the sad “slide instead of hit” mistake this morning, thankfully I set multiple alarms *just in case*. Since my phone is now my alarm, i get to go on a scavenger hunt every morning – under the bed, in the covers, in the night stand drawer… who knows where it ended up! Awesome :)

  3. haha this post is absolutely fantastic. My roomate this year at school would always make fun of me because my alarm clock was on the dresser which was next to my desk which was next to my bed and somehow, every morning, I would stretch as far as I could just to press the snooze button (about 10 times of course). I could’ve just walked over, but nah, I’d rather go all out and stretch.

  4. Unfortunately I cannot do any of these. I keep my alarm clock on the other side of the room so I have to get up to hit the snooze button. If I had it beside my bed, I would turn it off in my sleep and then be late for everything!
    I don’t have one of those annoying alarm clocks that sound like a semi truck honking its horn. No, mine is a quite little beep. But if I don’t get to it in time, it gets louder and louder. My snooze time is only 4 minutes instead of the 9 that most clocks have, but sometimes those 4 minutes feels like an hour!

    1. First, Bekah, congratulations on Friday’s announcement. How’s it going? My daughter’s name is Becca so I will have to make sure I have my wife’s full attention before I tell her about you or she might have a heart attack!

      I rarely snooze my alarm – like Bekah it’s on the opther side of the room . What is interesting is the thought process as I am staggering towards it. “Just 7 more minutes – yeah, I’ll snooze it just once”. By the time I get there “I guess I’m up now”. A change of heart every morning. Also, I don’t have a loud one – it’s set between stations so I just get a soft hissssss, like a soft rain on the roof. Rain sounds the same but comes from a different angle so doesn’t wake me. I’m always amazed at the brain’s power to sort information and use it properly…

      1. What’s really sad is when you put your alarm clock / phone across the room and STILL snooze. Literally get out of bed, cross the room, hit snooze, and stumble back to bed … all in the name of nine extra minutes of sleep. I’m not proud of it, but I have done this.

        Lucky for me, every night when I set my alarm I pull a #959 and plan for snoozes. I’m talking like setting the alarm for 45 minutes before actual wake-up time. I can get a solid five snoozes in. My friends are like, “That’s so ridiculous, why not just use those minutes for uninterrupted sleep?”

        To each his own, I say. :)

        1. I plan for only one 4 minute snooze. On Friday’s however, I do hit the snooze button a few more times and it ends up making hubby mad cuz I’m in and out of bed every 4 minutes. lol

          1. My wife almost always wakes up before I do, and used to set her alarm to 1 minute snoozes. You read that correctly: a ONE MINUTE snooze!

            Given that she still snoozes about the same amount as a regular person (10-20 minutes), this gets absolutely preposterous.

            We’re currently at 5 minute snoozes for her, and it still seems pretty silly to me. I’m a standard 10 minute snooze guy myself.

            2. 1 min?!? thatz terrible! it takes me, like, 15 minutes 2 get 2 sleep in teh 1st place! im a terrible napper.

              1. Glad to see that you guys all feel the same way. Needless to say, we put an end to the 1 minute snoozes a while back.

                If the wife ever tries to reintroduce them, I’ll print out the strong responses I’ve received here, as further evidence that this idea is CrAzY.

                1. OK, that one made me laugh out loud – for real. One minute snoozes – ha ha ha.

                  I remember back in high school I had a job helping to put inserts into the local newspaper – I had to be there at 2:00 AM and would work for 2 hours, walk home, sleep until the alarm went off, and get up for school. I was so tired that I would often cross the room, open the drawer I had hideen the alarm in, turn it off (not snooze – off!) and go back to bed, and not remember any of it. I was late more times than I can remember.

                  It’s nice being older (55) and not needing as much sleep. I still work crazy hours, but frequently wake up just before the alarm goes off.

      2. Thanks Ken!!! Everything’s going as fine as it can be at the moment. I’m about to take an illegal nap here at work though.

  5. My alarm is usually one of three things; white noise blasting from my actual alarm clock, my cat scratching at the door so she can leave, or my dog barking and/or trying to eat my face off.

    All of these happen at around five in the morning. The outsource is what I use, because my sister’s closer to the alarm than I am. And if it’s an animal… pillows make great gags.

  6. can I just say I love that Frank Warren was the featured person for this post. I love his website as well! I’m so glad I have the book of Awesome to keep me occupied on my flight over to Spain this wednesday!

  7. Snoozing is one of my personal Most Awesome. I’ve tried every one of these techniques except the Toe Tap. Way too acrobatic for me. As much as it would be an awesome feat, I think I’d be fully awake before I managed it!

  8. my awesome thing of the day… a drivers license photo that doesnt look like a mug shot! for once i left the mva happy!

  9. I use an alarm clock with two alarms. I set the first alarm to go off an hour before I have to get up, and I set the second alarm to go off right when I need to get up. One hour snooze! So cool!

    Also, I enjoy the picture of Frank from Postsecret. An awesome guy with an awesome website.

  10. so true but i’m going to have to read over the part about hitting it with your toe.
    anyway i’m in grade 6 so i read your blog everyday to keep me cheered up

    Stay awesome!!!!! =)

  11. Love franks awesome things. I recently spent a week working at and outdoor school camp and found all of the things in the book of awesome that I could enjoy while there. it was fantastic! Love the book. and I really love franks “on a long drive discovering a great radio station that energizes you and takes your mind off the road.” I definitely did that yesterday and it made the drive so much better!

  12. I love this post about hitting the snooze button. I love even more though the email from Frank. I read both your blogs and both things make me extremely happy (PostSecret and 1000 Awesome Things) so whats better then to see that the two of you correspond as well. This just made my morning, thanks!

  14. FRANK! Hero!

    I’m kind of in my own category. I call it Blind Luck.

    One desperate, awkward swipe at my alarm clock usually can do it for me. Whether it be a reach-under-the-bed, a full on slap, or even a kick, I’ve gotten pretty good at hitting my alarm on the first try.

    Unfortunately, I’ve even trained my self to turn the alarm off, rather than snooze it. Not the best idea…

  15. SHUT UP! The CBS Early show!?! How early will I have to set my alarm so that I can snooze it and still see you on the Early show?

    1. It’s on at 7 am central time … but I think it’s on at 7 in every time zone. So … given that you want to snooze for at least TWO snoozes, have time to go pee, put in some contacts or something, and throw on some clothes … I’d say you better set that thing for at LEAST 6:15! Just incase. Also … you should check when it’s on in your area because I just don’t trust myself to relay this vital bit of information to you.

      1. I have my DVR set to record it. I’m already at work by the time it comes on. I could always go into the presidents office and turn the tv on…just make sure I’m out before he shows up. Maybe I’ll set an alarm. ;-)

        1. Argh.. Congrats on the CBS thing and all, but I just went to their website to catch details of the early show, and had last night’s Survivor winner ruined for me.

          I’d managed to get through a full day, spoiler free, and was all set to go home and catch the Survivor finale on my DVR, and now its ruined.

          Thanks a lot, Neil and all your darn fame and publicity! Back when the only media outlets that covered your blog was your mom’s photocopied ‘zine about your site, this never happened!

          2. Sorry, Freddo, but I laughed and laughed! If it makes you feel any better, the VERY FIRST season of Survivor got spoilered for me. Keep in mind this was 10 years ago, so pre-DVR. We were renting a cottage that week with no TV, had set our VCR at home to record it, and were hoping that being out in the wilds and all, we could avoid finding out the winner until we got home. Well, wouldn’t you know a stupid gas station had display copies of the stupid Globe & Mail, with a stupid picture of stupid Richard Hatch on the stupid front page. Sigh.

            Ever since then, I always just watch it live, or not at all!

  17. Haha, this is a great site!

    I’ve focused on creating awesome individuals, you’ve focused on showcasing awesome things and appreciating the awesomeness of life.

    Well done sir!

  18. Ah, Frank! I met him on Saturday.
    My favorite two blogs are yours & his! : )

  19. HA! And just this morning I was congratulating myself on memorizing the EXACT spot that I place my Ipod Ihome remote so that I can grab it, feel out the snooze button and then press it to get an extra ten minutes of snooze bliss – all without rolling over or opening my eyes. Good on you!

  20. back when i got my alarm clock, “poker face” was my least fave song (that was b4 justin beiber) i figured out how it worked, and it automatically played “poker face”. sigh.

    how do u wake up lady gaga?

    poker face!!

    1. Poker Face? Yeah – that’s a pretty awful way to wake up.

      Scarier still? The mental image you provided by mentioning waking up to the ACTUAL Lady Gaga? Imagine opening your eyes to find her standing over you, in all her scary costumed glory. That’s frightening enough to never make you want to go to sleep again.

  21. Why is the snooze default always set to 9 minutes? Really. What an odd number, no?

  24. my alarm clock has a remote control. what a joy it is to find it on the bedside and put it under the covers for an extra 5, no, 10, no 30 minutes of sleep without moving more than my hand out of the covers. excellent in a cold bedroom.

    1. I want an alarm with a remote control!! But I’m not sure I could buy one without feeling extremely guiltly about it!! Hmmm, maybe I will get one as a gift. ;o)

  25. I think I’m an extreme case of “The Blindfold”. I turn off the alarm in my sleep, before it even goes off.

  26. I used to put the alarm across the room so it would force me to fully wake up between snoozes. Now my boyfriend hits snooze for me 3 or 4 times every morning, even when he doesn’t have to get up. That is truly awesome. :)

  27. Last semester my alarm would go off a good hour or two before I actually had to be in class two days a week, I’d just forgo the snooze button altogether, though this always ran the risk of oversleeping, but when I successfully pulled it off it was especially awesome.

  28. that’s such an awesome thing! I do that pretty much every morning.

    ps. frank is awesome!

  30. Hee hee! I saw “Acrobatic Sneezing” as the title, so it set off a whole different image … I saw the photo as a man grappling blindly for his Kleenex box and encountering the alarm clock instead!

    Thanks for the laugh … I’ve seen my husband do this frenzied grope so many times, and he is a truly *acrobatic* sneezer. He has fits that rat-a-tat for five or six explosions; they come upon him with such speed and force that they’re sometimes finished before either of us has found the Kleenex box … ;-D

  31. Ahh the lovely snooze button… I can say I do 1 and 2 most mornings, and then sleep in too late and have to get up in a rush.

    Ps. the lady in the image looks like Lady Gaga….

  33. Okay well I have a different snooze technique. It is sad I have decided. Because I am a workaholic I set my alarm on my blackberry and sleep with it in hand. I have a 5 minute snooze and usually press it twice, but my alarm doesn’t get passed the first beep in the morning because it is already in my hand.

  34. don’t forget managing to reach over your significant other and hit snooze without waking him/her up…i am the master of that…

  35. I love the toe vent thing. I HAVE to have a toe vent. hahahah I love finding out that the weird quirky things that I do are actually quite common for other people.

  36. I love thist post! When my alarm goes off, I grab it, hit the snooze button, and keep it in my hand for easy access for 2 or 3 more snoozes. I sometimes lose it under my husband’s pillow.

  37. I enjoyed the story. I’ve recently mastered my IPhone snooze, laughing, but I glad I’m not the only one attempting the foot maneuver, still mastering with one glass casualty.

  38. so what i became accustomed to doing was the “no looker”. where i don’t consciously remember turning off the alarm. and I wasn’t a snoozer per say, i went right for the turn off, which in retrospect got me much more sleep while missing some hours of school. My unconscious alarm turning off skills got to the point where I had to put my alarm on the other side of the room, where it got progressively louder so I had to get out of bed to turn it off. A wonderful idea for the first couple days until my body became adjusted with making these movements. Soon I would wake up and it’d be 30 minutes after my alarm went off and the alarm itself would be turned off. But I’d never remember doing it.

  39. I actually have my alarm clock on my floor right now, and my bed is low to the ground.. And sometimes I sleep ‘upside’ down on my bed and when it goes off I reach my foot over and tap the snooze button perfectly in like 1 second.

  40. I have to get up and reach up to reach my radio clack alarm… but the antenna cord is stuffed so its just quiet static, which doesnt wake me up for about 1/2 hour anyways… So i’ve never used the snooze button.

  41. My phone has a motion detector!!! I don’t even have to find a button. Just wave your hand over the phone and snooze away! Awesome.

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