#195 Burps that taste good

I love burritos.

Wrap a chewy tortilla around a slopful of sticky beans, blackened chicken, and creamy guacamole and that’s a pretty fine lunch. Hey, squirt some sour cream in there, sprinkle grated cheese, and splat some salsa on and you just made it better.

Burritos are so delicious that I eat them as fast as possible. I don’t talk, I don’t blink, and I don’t breathe during my super-fast-super-chomp moments of gobbling down the goods. By the end I’m a heavy breathing mess with salsa streaks down my chin, rogue tin foil scraps on my shirt, and sweat dripping down my forehead.

I know it sounds like a pretty picture but the truth is I start filling with regret at this point. After all, I mean — I probably just parted with eight or nine bucks and the five-minute chowdown doesn’t seem worth the fat lump sitting my stomach. It’s a thousand calories for five minutes of tastiness. Somehow the math just doesn’t add up.

But that’s what makes it so great when a Burrito Ghost joins me about two hours later in the form of a deep burp  from 20,000 leagues deep in my stomach. Suddenly splashy scents of chopped tomatoes, cilantro-sprinkled rice, and spicy salsa join me for a brief reminder of the World’s Most Delicious Lunch.

Burgers, bruschetta, garlic bread — it doesn’t matter. Those flavor memories combine to form some serious meal nostalgia.

Oh sure, your snobby friends may say it’s disgusting.

But we all know it’s


Photos from: here and here

49 thoughts on “#195 Burps that taste good

      1. ha ha. I like the way he worded it. Kind of reminds me of the way I eat burritos and tacos. Eat ’em fast before the goods fall out!

        Choloclate anything burp is good!

  1. “BRAVO! I just ADORE your craft, your look, your shining eyes…YOU, young man ARE THE WHOLE PACKAGE…you’ve got it all…YOU ARE A STAR and I love you!” (forms heart shape with hands, winks and smiles sincerely)… that’s what Sharon Osborn would say, and I DARLING, AGREE!

      1. wooop! Good thing the wolf in the garden was howling so loudly at the moon last night. He woke me up just in time to smell how rotten burrito burps really smell!

        1. We have coyotes and a wolves too! I wonder if we live on the same mounatin? I wonder what wolves burps smell like and “I wonder, wonder, who boopy-doo-oo-oo, who wrote the book of love?” and tell us, tell us, tell us, the honest to goodness truth, that really was a burrito fart you smelled and not a burrito burp!

          1. I know, I know, who wrote the book of love. Rumi :)

            “Today, like every other day, we wake up empty
            and frightened. Don’t open the door to the study
            and begin reading. Take down a musical instrument.
            Let the beauty we love be what we do.
            There are hundreds of ways to kneel and kiss the ground.”

  2. Awe, you can taste the mixture of savory and sweet in these lines. I’m laughing while I say “What a lovely burp!”

    1. Neil says “Those flavor memories combine to form some serious meal nostalgia.” And the song is Memory from Cats.

      1. Well, the perm says the cat is stuck in the 80’s and I think Neil likes to time travel there like I do the 60’s and 70’s.
        And however beautiful, “Memories”, by Van Morrison and “Memories” by Barabara Streisand are far too sad a way to “burrito-roll” out the weekend,
        Neil is the superman for always having the peoples around the world, best interest at heart; laughs, farts and tasty belches:)

  3. I love burritos too, but I don’t really like the burp burrito. I am a fan of Fruit Loop burps though.
    I do say to myself after a burp, “Ew that tasted gross.” Unless of course it doesn’t, but then I don’t say anything….

    1. lol! That’s really funny. I guess I too am more likely to admit that a burp tasted gross before I admit it actually tasted good. Well, I guess that depends on the company I’m with =p

  4. Bekah, Froot Loops, agree! But I really miss Trix! For come mysterious reason Canada foods cancelled them out, yet keep red food dye hidden in many foods, which according to investigative jounalism show “16×9”, is made from RED BEETLES swept off giant cacti and then truned into all kinds of RED DYES which are making some people extremely sick!
    So I just need to say, Neil, I hope you never burp up a beetle from a burrito and would one of you kind Americans please send me a case of Trix!
    Thank you.

    “Broccoflower au gratin” cream soup is one of my all time favorites-Yummy!

    1. Aw, no Trix for you? I’m so sorry. That is my daughter and hubby’s favorite cereal and I keep it in stock at the house. Common down for some Trix for breakfast!!

            1. I’d say, “That’s Grrrrrrreat!”, but that would just be all wrong…Remember to tuck your ears and tail, so you don’t pose risk of a day in jail.

  5. Agreed! Burrito burps rock! You shoudl try the small pinto bean burrito at Quesada on the corner of King and Church Streets. DELICIOUS! Just ask your burp!

      1. Hey, chalsito, did you know we’re supposed to get inet points for the “relevant reference to Broccoflower…”
        Soooo, where is that points person anyway???!

  6. This post is awesome! Finally getting down to the nitty gritty, call it for what it is……a burrrp! And to then proceed and describe it so eloquently….even more awesome!
    My sons are going to love this post.

  7. I am not snobby…but that’s GROSS…and nowhere near awesome :p

    But while we’re on “awesomely” disgusting things…what about having a really upset stomach and then finally farting a HUGE fart relieving your stomach of all the pressure….that’s kinda grossly awesome

  8. Few things in life satisfy like a solid belch. Eructation is the only bodily function that allows us to taste twice; God knew what He was doing! ;^)

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