#221 Using your keyless entry remote to find your car in a big parking lot

Neil Pasricha

First, there is nothing.

You mindlessly walk into the Sea of Cars from the mall and start tapping your remote over and over and over again into quiet and silent night. Foggy memories of parking near the pizza smell by the back slowly hit you and you groggily stumble forward like a zombie … deeper and deeper into the concrete bowels of the lot. Yes, wedged between door handles and tailpipes you’re a Parking Lot Disaster until — suddenly! You hear it! Getting closer!

Be-beep.

Be-beep.

Be-beep.

Be-beep.

Be-beep!

Be-beep!

AWESOME!

52 thoughts to “#221 Using your keyless entry remote to find your car in a big parking lot”

    1. Lovethebadguy, it seems we were commenting at the same time and now that I’ve read about your love for your car I feel bad for dissing mine. He’s a poor old car too…and my first car…and he’s good to me. At least he’s a light blue color that makes him easier to spot in a crowd. I’m going to go apologize… =(

      1. I’m sure he will appreciate that. (:

        (I’m also glad to see I’m not the only person who affectionately calls their car “him”. Mine even has a name – “Val”. It’s from the number plate, but I prefer to think it’s short for Valium. It’s like having the name Will, short for William!)

        1. Val/Valium, I like that haha. My car is named Wheezer, but he also goes by Sasser =)

        2. Interesting.. I don’t know many other dudes (or dude cars) named Val, aside from the obvious Val Kilmer.. And according to wiki, his Val isn’t short for anything.. just Val..

          Btw: Has anyone seen what’s happened to that guy? He should be a cautionary tale for every new, young, Hollywood stud.. I want to take a picture of Fat Kilmer and put it next to Top Gun Kilmer and show them to Jacob (whatever that guy’s name is in real life.. Taylor something??), and say: “For the love of all that is holy.. Hang on to those abs, my dear boy.. don’t let this happen to you!!”

          1. HA! Yeah, we are Team Jacob’s Hot Abs, not Team Unconditional Love for Jacob. Sounds harsh, but … everyone needs a little tough love from time to time.

            2. NOW we know why Bella picked Edward! He may have second-rate abs, but at least they’re going to stay exactly the same…forever…

  3. I could definitely use some of that awesomeness. I get turned around so quickly. If I ever don’t remember where I parked…I’m doomed…there’s no hope.

  4. My family jokes with my sister that she and I should swap cars for that reason (mine has a clicker and hers doesn’t) — when it comes to parking, I never forget the location and she never remembers! That – coupled with her poor sense of direction – doesn’t make for a speedy time in locating her parked car when solo.

    I did have to use this feature once, at the most twisted and user-UNfriendly parking garage EVER. Except … my car doesn’t be-beep when I lock it, so we had to resort to using the ever-useful “panic” button. You know, the red one that no one ever uses because it’s the equivalent of remotely activating the car alarm. We found it VERY quickly, though. :)

    1. But why would your sister want a car with a rotting tub of Ben & Jerry’s in the back…

      oh, yeah.. right, right.. it was “a friend”… my bad.. :)

      1. Yeaahhhh, yeaahhhh. When you come change my windshield wiper blades and we take in an STL sports game of some variety, we’ll see who has the impeccably clean car and who goes back to CA with a trunk full of B&J.

        :)

    2. btw: I had a traumatic experience with a car alarm when I was a kid. We were on a road trip, and I fell asleep in the back seat. My family stopped at a rest stop and parked the car. I was sound asleep so they left me there in the back seat totally conked out. So, the closed the doors, locked the car with the remote-entry button, and headed inside to eat some Bob’s Big Boy or something..

      (here is where you should insert some comment about what good parenting it was to leave a kid in the back of a car at a rest stop on the side of the highway in the summer heat.. you wouldn’t do this to a dog!!)

      Anyways, I ended up waking up some time later, totally drenched in sweat (the car must have been 105 degrees at this point), and totally confused as to where we were, where my family was, what was happening, who I was, etc., etc.. So, I decide to try to go find them and open the car door and… you guessed it..

      HONK HONK HONK HONK HONK HONK

      Now I’m sweaty, confused, tired, flustered and everyone is staring at me because I just set off this car’s alarm..

      I think I just ran around the parking lot for a while and eventually my family found me and shut off the alarm..

      It was not one of my shining moments.

      1. Yes, I probably should be concerned at the lack of parenting finesse here, but I can’t make any comment about it, because I’m too busy LAUGHING MY ARSE OFF!!

        Oh, poor Freddo. May not be a shining moment, but certainly an interesting memory!

        (:

      2. Oh Freddo, this is so sad … so very hilariously sad!

        I hope you weren’t traumatized for life. Maybe put this on your hypothetical parenting not-to-do list. Then again, kids are too sheltered these days … so maybe just play it by ear. ;)

    3. We hired a car recently and had a car seat fitted through a different company than the car hire company. The car seat fitter didn’t let the hire company know where the car was located. So what do they do, they walks us through the lot using the panic button to locate it. I thought it was awesome!!

  5. My car doesn’t do this since the battery in the key died long ago :( I’ve always been told it’s expensive to get it replaced but I think I may have to do it soon anyway, it’s annoying the life out of me

    1. whoever told you that is yanking your chain. If you have a dollar store where you live, they are cheap. Caution though, some vehicles have a code in the manual to enter before and after you put the new battery in, in order for it to work properly.

      1. Yeah … mine just looks like an oversized watch battery and is really inexpensive. :)

  6. When I’m on a biz trip I could never find my rental car in a big lot without this. Don’t remember where I parked and don’t even remember what the outside of the car looks like! Thank you awesome remote car finder!

  7. all this reminds me of is that if you unlock the car from a greater distance, it will make it easier for thieves to steal it.

    1. Fortunately, with my car, you have to be just a few feet away for it to unlock. I don’t know if its suppose to be like that or if the button is just ‘quitting’ on me.

      1. I just replaced the battery in mine in hopes of extending the range, but unfortunately I still have to be standing right next to the car for it to work. I might try the panic button. Maybe it has a different range…

    2. When I’ve been with friends (or my mom!) and we’ve pulled this maneuver, they just repeatedly hit “lock” … because it be-beeps every time it’s locked. So it never UNlocks, just keeps locking and beeping.

  8. I’m pretty good about remembering where I park, but I do believe I have used this method a few times. I do know that once was at Six Flags, hubby dropped us off at the gate and he went and parked the car….but didn’t pay attention to where he was parking. When we got out I just started walking like I knew where it was. A few steps into the parking lot I remembered that I didn’t know…it was one of those “Did I really do that” moments. Thankfully my beep on my car is pretty loud, so it didn’t take long.

    1. Also good for when hubby drops you at the gate and you don’t even see where he parked but you are the one retrieving the car :)

  9. One of my cars has this option, but the other doesn’t. I realize the difference when I am searching for the car that doesn’t have the remote option, in a massive parking lot!

    BTW, I bet this is why some people have crazy colored cars (neon green or bright yellow), because they stand out in a parking lot!! So while we may secretly laugh at them on the road, they’re secretly laughing at us while we wander around aimlessly in a parking lot!!! lol

    1. Oh, yelllow cars. I usually laugh or say “Yellow Car!” when I see one. It’s just something about them but they definitely are easy to spot anywhere.
      I might not ever get a green or yellow car but I would love a burnt orange one. Maybe one day =)

    2. I bought a very distintive antenna topper to put on my antenna so I could see it from far away and know where my car was. After I bought it, I went out to my car to put it on………….. and I don’t have an antenna, or at least one that sticks up so I can put something on it. http://media.ed.edmunds-media.com/pictures/VEHICLE/2002/Oldsmobile/100002855/2002.oldsmobile.alero.8725-300×189.jpg
      See? There’s none. That’s exactly what my car looks like… only mine needs a trip through the car wash.

    1. My bff’s mom had a yellow car once. It was weird cuz EVERYONE knew it was her. Bright yellow car, yeah, there’s getting away from anyone in that thing.

        1. Hopefully your best friend’s mother doesn’t decide to be the getaway car in a robbery at any point in time, cause if she does, she is SCREWED!

          :D

          1. Unless, suddenly, the city is full of identical-looking yellow cars, all driven by clowns. Note: your friend’s mom should be dressed as a clown for this to work.

  11. The big, deep, multi-levelled underground parking lots are the most entertaining for this experience. It’s so easy to get turned around and your mind can’t help but wonder what else is lurking between all those door handles; behind all those tail pipes, monster trucks and vans. You think about those zombies from the deeper, deeper depths of the concrete bowels… looking so sweet and innocent in their groggily stumble, but YOU know better!
    You start to skip and whistle; your heart beats faster; the eyes in the back of your head open wide…your primal brain so acute, there’s no room for common sense.
    Finally, you hear the music to your ears…your very own “beep-beep”! Now you’re speed walking for your life-line… just as you smell the pizza, (which is really the zombies rising you know)…your hand reaches the car…with not a second for fumbling… quickly open the door…heave your fragile packages in, “wherever”, leap in and ignite engine. Pedal to the medal, fast and furiously you squeal away, looking back only once for the full effect of your smile; hear the echo fade of yet another unscathed escape and laugh.
    *Definately one of the most dramatic conclusions EVER, as you exit the darkness of the tunnel and enter out into the light of the world with your incredible survivor skills and blissful awesomeness.

      1. Frightening to think it’s all your fault! The be-beep, be-beep, be-beep of your keyless remote is what woke the zombies in the first place! ha-ha-ha

  12. I recently had a rental car and had to resort to this in the parking lot because 1. I had NO idea where I parked and 2. I didn’t even know what color the car was I had just gotten out of, and when I heard it beeping and lighting up I still didn’t believe that was the right car, I could have sworn mine had VA tags and was charcoal color and this one had MD tags and was silver, it was the correct car, however haha.

  13. Yes! I can tell you what the dashboard and interior of my rental looks like, but the outside? No chance!

  15. This is so true. I remember so many occasions where I tried to find my car but had to resort to using my key-less entry to help me out. How life would be without our key -less entry. How good you feel once you can finally start hearing your car and then you finally spot it.

    1. Its a good idea, but I wouldn’t trust that thing to carry my car. I’d be afraid it would drop it or try to squish it in an already filled parking spot.

  18. My aunt’s remote used to have the beep-beep sound, but she broke it long time ago, so we can only search the car by seeing the head light flashing. :3

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