#89 Rogue children

Neil Pasricha

You’re out for dinner.

You’re having a chat in your booth when a rogue child suddenly appears at your table. Everybody stops to look at the Junior Runaway, living the romantic nomadic life between sticky tables and wobbly chairs at the chain restaurant. There are smiles, a couple friendly hellos, and then a parent appears to claim the child.

Rogue children appear anywhere parents are busy and kids are bored. Furniture showrooms, bank lineups, dentist offices, all fine places to spot endangered rogue children in their natural setting. Keep your eyes peeled for these three-foot creatures, who will likely be shy and curious, and pose no threat unless threatened, in which case they will bite.

Let’s let rogue children remind us that the world is a pretty simple place.

We’re all little kids wandering around looking for interesting things.

AWESOME!

Get someone The Book of Awesome for Christmas!

Photo from: here

40 thoughts to “#89 Rogue children”

  2. GOOD rogue children, sure. They can be adorable! But there’s nothing more annoying to me than a rogue child who, without adult supervision, will shout and cause a scene and generally be a pain in the arse.

    Also, rogue children in CINEMAS? Just shoot me now.

  3. My friends think children are drawn to me. It’s weird because no matter where I am (bank, store, movies) some kid will make eye contact with me and wave and say hi. Some even try to start conversations!

    My mom is the same way but mostly with the very elderly. Whenever I lose her in a store I find her having some random conversation with some stranger :)

    1. Hahaha! :) my mom is just like that! :) whenever we’re at the store, people just start talking to her like an old friend. :)

  4. My brother and sister have always been like that. Even at our own table, everybody stops and stares at them.

  5. Its weird yes, but it happens. My littlest one likes to wonder off, but I always keep an eye on him. He’s just learning to walk and he loves people. I don’t let him wonder off in places like a restaurant though…. I don’t want someone to grab my kid and run off.
    There’s this one little boy on my daughter’s soccer team, every time there is a break during practice or something, he always comes and sits beside of me instead of his own mom. And he just stares and stares no matter what I say or do, until its time for practice to resume.

  6. I used to be a rogue child. My mom says ever since I started walking until I was 7 or 8 I’ve found my way into the kitchen of every restaurant we ever went to. Maybe it was a sign that I’d turn out to be a great cook ; )

  8. Clearly, this topic is about as contraversial as politics, religion, and the 1980’s!
    When my children were young; given similar circumstances, *we* were called many things, but never one with such tasteful charm as “rogue”.
    Today, however; I will stage the scene and give this a whirl; pride and dignity in tact- I do say… “Why, yes of course, they are my adorable little grand-rogues; rouges en “Vouge, vogue, vogue, vogue, vogue!”
    I LOVE it! Thanks man=D

  10. Remember that surge of relief and gratitude that rushes over you on being a rogue child claimed? Definitely awesome :)

      1. Na. I’m a trusting kid. My theory is to do my own thing until I’m rescued/found and brought home.

          1. :)
            As a kid, I adored my big brother. We were both mischievous, fun loving rogue kids and he meant absolutely the world to me. It made us both a little sad that one of his friends was a much bigger and more beautiful bully who used to tease me when we tried to play together. They were really good friends and he liked playing with her so I tried not to mind that he’d send me away day after day. I knew that I would always be special to him too. I was his baby sis after all! ;)

  11. Ha ha! A rouge child was hiding under a table at the bagel shop and scared my 17-year-old son the other day. Made him jump a mile. I think he is still scarred… (we laughed the whole way home!)

  12. I always laugh when a rogue child grabs onto your leg, then looks up, realizes you’re not mommy, and then bolts off.

  13. Somewhat not on topic but awesome nonetheless…Does anybody have an authentic home-made mac and cheese recipe?

    1. A family member of mine puts in 3 different types of melted cheeses: Parmesan, mozzarella and bocconcini. Sometimes she leaves out the bocconcini cheese. :)

        1. No worries! You might want to put more of your favourite kind of cheese in and minimise the others to suit it to your liking. Also, if your family’s a bunch of dairy fiends, then may I suggest a little cream as well. :)

          I’m lactose intolerant and it has gotten worse over the years, so I can’t eat this any more – but phwoaaarrr did I enjoy it!

          1. Did we ever enjoy it too! Hubby o-d’ed and passed out on the couch. My girl’s and I appear to be mid-term gestation of baby cows and have taken 3 lactaid’s each! Well, time to waddle over and decorate the tree! *Tanks again*, was sinfully good, Lizzie!

  14. I love it. It’s almost close to the “looking at the sky” post!

    I was one of these kids. Every time at Sizzler’s, Mum would dress me up in a tartan kilt with a white turtle-neck and my favourite beret that Dad brought back from France one time xD. Everyone by the end of the night knew my name, my middle name, my last name, address and phone number.

    Little did I know I was putting my parent’s up for identity theft :P lol.

  15. I had a rogue toddler at work today (I’m a librarian). Mom was on the computer and someone else was in the children’s section. Rogue Toddler would just run back and forth, back and forth, in between the two–always checking out of the corner of her eye to see if I was watching. She was so cute I couldn’t even yell at her mom for lack of parenting skills.

  16. These are my 3 nieces at any restaurant. One time my youngest one, who just learned to walk strolled right into the kitchen to wave hello to the chefs :P

  17. I had a little girl follow me down 2 aisles in a supermarket before I realized she was there. I brought her back to her mom, who DIDN’T EVEN KNOW SHE WAS GONE. Gosh, these people need to watch their kids. ;) I love rogue kids!!

  18. I work at a supermarket, and kids totally make my day….rogue or not ;). I like to imagine how much fun it would be if the adults would act like the kids for a day….making instant friends, crying for a candy, running around in circles, breaking out into a little dance or song….wouldn’t that be fun? Of course some adults do have the odd tantrum, it’s more unpleasant in a big person for sure haha.

  19. Rogue children are terrifically cute…
    Especially when they try to make friends with you.
    Rogue babies are even funnier. They just crawl up to you and you’re not sure what to do. =D

  20. Definitely disagree on this one. As an adult with grown children, I can’t stand being out to eat and have some snot nosed kid come look at you… and expect you to greet them with a welcome smile. I glare and stare back, no smile.

  22. My little sister got me the Book of Awesome for Christmas! :) The part about old playground equipment brings me back to a time when I used to wonder what those bench designed ones were for…. only to realize that it was for doing push-ups haha. Awesome!

  23. According to my wife’s psych education, children who wander freely have a secure sense of attachment to their parents. Still, I’m wary of people who let their kids go too far in a public area. Hehe, has anyone played the game Heavy Rain? Lots of disturbing scenarios, but searching frantically for my son in an overcrowded mall right at the start made everything else seem trivial by comparison.

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