#774 Discovering those little tabs on the sides of the aluminum foil box

Neil Pasricha 91 Comments

Subject of our discussion Put your hand up if you’ve ever accidentally yanked the entire roll of aluminum foil out of the box when you were trying to swipe a small slice?

My brother, if your hand is up right now, you are not alone.

See, I’m a bit clumsy in the kitchen, too. My oven burners are covered in burnt sauce stains, my sink drains are full of slithery, rainbow-colored bits of last night’s dinner, and my Tupperware cupboard looks like the Tasmanian Devil’s mudroom.

a-plague-in-your-tupperware-cupboardAnd add to these issues my apparent love of yanking entire sheets of aluminum foil clear out of the box. Honestly, I just give a little tug and out pops the entire roll, hitting the floor and rolling away while laughing its trademark crackly metallic laugh.

Yeah, just tell me that’s not a pathetic scene: cut to freeze-frame of tired-looking man in bedhead and sweatpants holding the edge of aluminum foil in one hand and an empty box in the other, then slowly pan down to a floor covered in a thick, shiny snake of metal crinkled across the floor.

Folks, the only thing that looks worse is the fat, crumpled rolled-back-up roll half-stuffed in the box after you tried to put it back together again.

Yes, we’ve all been there.

But guess what? High tens around the room, because there is hope for People Like Us. Shockingly, I have recently discovered those little tabs on the side of the aluminum foil box that hold the roll in place! Believe it, food preservation fans, because they truly exist.

The gas arrowYes, the little tabs on the side of the aluminum foil box can be indented so they anchor the roll in the box. Honestly, it’s a jaw-dropping discovery — like finding out your new apartment gets free Wireless or realizing there’s a little arrow in your car that tells you where to find your gas hole.

Now, whenever it was, whenever it is, whenever it will be: how good does it feel when you first discover those little tabs yourself? Give it up for a pretty good buzz.

So join me today as we give thanks to that modern miracle of the kitchen cupboard: those little tabs on the side of the aluminum foil box.

Also on Saran Wrap.

AWESOME!

Witness the majesty and beautyPhotos from: here, here, and here

#776 When you’re watching one of your favorite movies and you realize you don’t remember how it ends

Neil Pasricha 31 Comments

grab-a-bite-and-have-a-seatYou know the feeling.

Your favorite characters are introduced, the story kicks off, but then a couple plot twists and turns seem a bit unfamiliar. Suddenly it dawns on you: you have no clue how the movie wraps up. No, you can’t remember who the killer is, who dies, or if the cats ever get married. You can’t remember the ending at all and you’re loving every minute of it.

Yes, you dim the lights, snuggle under the blanket, shush up your chatty husband, and stay glued to that screen.

Because it’s like hey, guaranteed blockbuster.

AWESOME!

its-the-big-dayPhotos from: here and here

#777 Reading the nutritional label and eating it anyway

Neil Pasricha 37 Comments

go-ahead-have-a-fewSometimes you just gotta peek.

As you unwrap the Lindt truffle, peel open the McDonald’s cheeseburger, or scoop that second bowl of ice cream, you can’t help turn the package around to glance at the nutritional information panel on the back.

And guess what’s waiting for you over there? You got it, baby: 64% of your daily saturated fat intake, 76% of your cholesterol, and a couple big buckets of carbs.

Then there’s the quick pause, involuntary eye-twitch, or guilty look at the person munching salad beside you. But I hope after that brief moment of self-doubt, you just keep going, man, you just keep scooping it in. Sure, you might have to turn the label away, avoid sodium for the rest of the day, or give your shoulders a shrug to say “Hey, it’s okay,” but I hope you keep going, hope you savor it slowly, and hope you enjoy every last bite.

Sometimes you just gotta read the nutritional label and eat it anyway.

Sometimes … you just gotta live.

AWESOME!

Don't turn the package around

Photos from: here and here

#778 When someone unjams the photocopier for you

Neil Pasricha 28 Comments

A spirally headacheA jammed photocopier is a terrible scene.

Yes, toner fumes fill the air, plastic doors are swung open, and crumpled papers lay wedged tightly in the Xerox machine’s Plinko board torso of hot springs and bright green clasps.

And there you stand at the scene of the crime in your pleated pants and button-down shirt. Yeah, I’m guessing the last thing you feel like doing right about now is dropping to your hands and knees and poking your fingers into a steaming engine of paper trays and twirly knobs.

That’s what makes it so great when a bugle blares softly the background and out pops the King Of The Office from around the cubicle wall. Yes, it’s Unjammer-Man, that young techie kid from the IT department who can de-clog the photocopier in no time flat and is happy to lend a hand.

Your lips curl into a big smile as you hug your expense report and watch him do the deed. Knobs are twiddled, clasps are fiddled, and soon the photocopier is humming like it’s a brand new day. Yes, now that someone’s unjammed the photocopier for you, you’re back in business, baby.

And you’re loving it.

AWESOME!

I bestow upon you the power of collatingPhotos from: here and here

#780 Squeezing through a door as it’s shutting without touching it

Neil Pasricha 71 Comments

Tiny squirts of adrenaline pump into your bloodstream when you pull off this classic move.

Yes, suddenly you morph from Guy Walking To The Subway After Work into Indiana Jones In That Scene Where He Slides Under The Wall At The Last Second. Your hands stay clean, your strut stays mean, and you zip through that closing door and don’t look back, hoping it doesn’t nail an old lady in the face behind you.

AWESOME!

37_door

Illustration from: here

#782 Mixing cookie batter with your bare hands

Neil Pasricha 38 Comments

dive-right-in1Yeah, yeah, health nuts, we know, we know.

Hands are the dirtiest part of our body — turning doorknobs, flushing toilets, shaking hands all day in a hot, neverending exchange of sweat, grime, and bacteria. And yes, those germs form tiny Ewok Villages in the cracks of our palm and corners of our fingernails and leap at any opportunity to settle down in a new home.

Germophobes of the world, we hear your warning. But we can’t heed your warning.
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E-E-E-E-Ewoks!No, we can’t help it, because squeezing the daylights out of raw cookie batter with our bare hands is too big an enjoyment and too effective a technique to pass up.
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Sure, some of us start with good intentions — mixing patiently with a fork as raw eggs slide everywhere, butter clumps up, and big flour towers stand tall on the sides of the bowl. But even those folks hit a wall eventually and just toss the fork in the sink, roll up their sleeves, and dive right into the batter fingers first.
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play-doh-spaghetti-factory1Yes, we squeeze and squeeze and squeeze that cold, wet mess and press it out through our fingers like a Play-Doh Spaghetti Factory. We squish butter up, rub flour in, and fold those chocolate chips in there good. When we’re done, sometimes we lick each of our fingers and get raw cookie batter all over our chin.
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But after it’s all over we slop those blobs on a baking pan and throw them right in the cooker for some fine tastin’.
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Completely unsanitary.
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Completely delicious.
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AWESOME!
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Victory

Photos from: here, here, here, and here